words on a wonky night

in that sacred room
you lost me
somewhere outside of a place you could touch
you knew that place
and how could we since we've never been?
in that sacred room
you found me
somewhere inside of a place you could feel
you knew your way
and how could we since we never were?
in that sacred room
behind all those doors
with the locks that had mismatched keys
the ones that never fit
somewhere outside a place we were
you knew your way
to that sacred room.


dedicated to the one i love tonight .... from rem .. strange currencies and our playlist
These words, "You will be mine."These words, "You will be mine." all the time.they say fool might be my middle nameBut I'd be foolish not to sayI'm going to make whatever it takes,ring you up, call you down, sign your name, secret love,make it rhyme, take you in, and make you mine.


if i ever tell you to go your own way
know that i mean
as long as it is straight back to me
if i ever tell you to take a hike
know that i mean
i want you to hike on back home
if i ever tell you to give me some time
know that i mean
to give me just enough time to cool
but not enough time to get cold
if i ever tell you to leave me alone
know that i mean
i would die if you really did
and i need you more than ever
but if i say i love you ...
know that it means just that
i love you
no ifs, no hidden language
no fine print
simply i love you...
it is exactly what it means.


maybe i'm still fucked up a little from the darvocette. maybe my mind is not reacting well at all. i seem a little bit fast tonight and i don't know why... and i took my regular medicine too. and i feel almost manic. shaky from the inside out.

"it's been a while since i've seen the way the candles light your face, it's been awhile but i can still remember just the way you taste"
that lyric by staind is one of, if not the best lyric ever written in rock in roll. i know one other person on the planet who agrees with me wholeheartedly on that statement. i miss him. he's my dear sweet friend alan. he started dating my best friend debra and i lost her as my friend and i lost touch with him too in the process of them breaking up. stupid. i hate that. the thing is he was one person in this place, in this town i could always count on to come bail me out of whereever i was ... if i was stranded somewhere and i could get him on the phone he would come. for every drunk i ever had when i couldn't drive he came and picked me up. and he was there when my dad passed and i was there for him when his mom passed. it's a shame to lose a good friend when your friends decide they wanna be lovers instead of friends. *sigh* see i am wonky. my brain is just going on some little funky road trip thinking about people.

why does every woman with an ugly mole insist on calling it a beauty mark? just a question i have. i wonder about these things. and if they could be removed like the whisker on your chin that grows like your grandma's did ... would you even keep it around? i have a little tiny freckle thingee on my upper lip. now my friend shelly has one on her upper lip and i think it makes her extremely kissable. but as for mine, i don't think it's that sexy at all. i know this chick with a little tiny scar on her upper lip and it's very sexy... it just makes you want to kiss her.

i know i'm not a lesbian, but i definitely have a part of me that finds other women sexy. and i'm attracted to all kinds of women and most of the time it's because of something they have that i find just charming or irresistable... or something about their personality, like a laugh. but the women i think are beautiful are so natural. no supermodels. but just because i find women sexy does not mean i want the man i love to point out sexy women to me. i'd rather point them out to him. then that way i don't feel like i'm being compared. instead it's like art we can both enjoy.

okay i'm definitely wonky.
i'm going to try like hell to go to sleep.
i definitely need some rest.

sweet dreams