no ice cream for you !
it's kinda funny how when you begin to worry about other people you stop thinking about yourself.
i have been so self absorbed lately that i haven't taken the time to notice the little problems in other people's lives. and that makes me feel a little guilty. typically i am not that kind of person at all. if a friend is in need then i am always available to try to help in anyway i can. and right now i know someone who is just like me, with a little much on their plate and i feel a bad because not only do i feel like i've added to what is on their plate, i feel like i haven't been a very good person in regard to helping them clear the mess on the table. i'm going to will myself to do a better job at worrying less about me and my outcome. worrying about myself never seems to do much good anyway. and maybe putting my good thoughts into someone else right now will send a certain amount of good karma my way.
i am supposed to go out today for a "girls" lunch with someone i work with. having summers off is a great adventure and it makes good fun to get together with people you haven't seen in a month to catch up and talk and chit chat about what's been going on. and to tell you the truth, i'm looking forward to adult company with someone who is not related to me. we can bitch about what a dickwad our boss is and how we will despise having to see him come august and talk about how we really don't care what he says or does in his anal retentive fashion. yes, i think it's going to be good.
we had an ice cream emergency last night around 10:30. the youngest child came running into my room at full speed... "we have nothing but women living in this house now and still there is nothing sweet to eat!!!!!!!!! we must go to sonic and get a junior banana split right now !"
i think she has pms.
so into the car in pajamas we went. sonic sucks by the way, at least the one by my house does. we get there, push the little red button, only to be told that they are out of ice cream. how the fuck does sonic run out of ice cream??? so the next best option that late at night was a convenience store, still in our pj's, a quick run in and a quick run out to get that little candy bar to calm the savage 11 year old. i have to admit that the candy bar at 11 pm was pretty damn tasty. and who the fuck cares if i was out in my pjs? i have no one to tell me not to be, and at my age i'm sure i can decide if pj's are appropriate attire for late night traveling.
and yes, i know, i'm not the mom of the year for letting an 11 year old have a candy bar at 11 at night. but guess what? it's her summer vacation too. it's the time of year where if she wants to stay up all night she can, and if she wants a candy bar at 11 she should be able to have one.
i don't want to be a mother who tells my girls "no you can't have what you really want because society says you can't and if i let you that will mean society says i'm a bad mother"
fuck society. they don't live in my house. they don't pay my bills or raise my kids.
and i certainly never intend to be the kind of mother who tells them "if you eat after 8pm it will go straight to your hips" whose beauty standard does that reasoning work off of? i know, i know, there is probably some logic and health reason for it, but still, i'm not going to raise anorexic or bulimic little girls who struggle their whole lives to be what television or magazines say they should be. instead i am going to teach them my mantra "fuck your fascist beauty standards".
it took me to the age of 35 to be comfortable in my own skin. god, i do not want that for them. i want them to be comfortable in their own skin for all of their lives and proud of who they are. i want them walk with their head held high and their shoulders back, not looking down at their own two feet all the time.
you know it's funny now to think back.
35 was the beginnining of my own personal sexual revolution.
i traded in mommy panties for thongs and sexy boy shorts and started really taking stock in how sexy 35 can be.
at 36 i decided that just because my husband didn't want sex didn't mean i had to stop having sex too.
at 37 i met the most incredible man in the world who showed me that love wasn't a bad four letter word and that there was more to life than just 3 meals a day and watching the evening news and going to bed promptly at 9:30. i also found out at 37 that all forms of sex can be good, well not just good, but great ! and, i found out that i want more of it!
i wonder what 38 will bring? it's only a few weeks away now. i swear if i get an AARP flyer i will shoot someone.
i have been so self absorbed lately that i haven't taken the time to notice the little problems in other people's lives. and that makes me feel a little guilty. typically i am not that kind of person at all. if a friend is in need then i am always available to try to help in anyway i can. and right now i know someone who is just like me, with a little much on their plate and i feel a bad because not only do i feel like i've added to what is on their plate, i feel like i haven't been a very good person in regard to helping them clear the mess on the table. i'm going to will myself to do a better job at worrying less about me and my outcome. worrying about myself never seems to do much good anyway. and maybe putting my good thoughts into someone else right now will send a certain amount of good karma my way.
i am supposed to go out today for a "girls" lunch with someone i work with. having summers off is a great adventure and it makes good fun to get together with people you haven't seen in a month to catch up and talk and chit chat about what's been going on. and to tell you the truth, i'm looking forward to adult company with someone who is not related to me. we can bitch about what a dickwad our boss is and how we will despise having to see him come august and talk about how we really don't care what he says or does in his anal retentive fashion. yes, i think it's going to be good.
we had an ice cream emergency last night around 10:30. the youngest child came running into my room at full speed... "we have nothing but women living in this house now and still there is nothing sweet to eat!!!!!!!!! we must go to sonic and get a junior banana split right now !"
i think she has pms.
so into the car in pajamas we went. sonic sucks by the way, at least the one by my house does. we get there, push the little red button, only to be told that they are out of ice cream. how the fuck does sonic run out of ice cream??? so the next best option that late at night was a convenience store, still in our pj's, a quick run in and a quick run out to get that little candy bar to calm the savage 11 year old. i have to admit that the candy bar at 11 pm was pretty damn tasty. and who the fuck cares if i was out in my pjs? i have no one to tell me not to be, and at my age i'm sure i can decide if pj's are appropriate attire for late night traveling.
and yes, i know, i'm not the mom of the year for letting an 11 year old have a candy bar at 11 at night. but guess what? it's her summer vacation too. it's the time of year where if she wants to stay up all night she can, and if she wants a candy bar at 11 she should be able to have one.
i don't want to be a mother who tells my girls "no you can't have what you really want because society says you can't and if i let you that will mean society says i'm a bad mother"
fuck society. they don't live in my house. they don't pay my bills or raise my kids.
and i certainly never intend to be the kind of mother who tells them "if you eat after 8pm it will go straight to your hips" whose beauty standard does that reasoning work off of? i know, i know, there is probably some logic and health reason for it, but still, i'm not going to raise anorexic or bulimic little girls who struggle their whole lives to be what television or magazines say they should be. instead i am going to teach them my mantra "fuck your fascist beauty standards".
it took me to the age of 35 to be comfortable in my own skin. god, i do not want that for them. i want them to be comfortable in their own skin for all of their lives and proud of who they are. i want them walk with their head held high and their shoulders back, not looking down at their own two feet all the time.
you know it's funny now to think back.
35 was the beginnining of my own personal sexual revolution.
i traded in mommy panties for thongs and sexy boy shorts and started really taking stock in how sexy 35 can be.
at 36 i decided that just because my husband didn't want sex didn't mean i had to stop having sex too.
at 37 i met the most incredible man in the world who showed me that love wasn't a bad four letter word and that there was more to life than just 3 meals a day and watching the evening news and going to bed promptly at 9:30. i also found out at 37 that all forms of sex can be good, well not just good, but great ! and, i found out that i want more of it!
i wonder what 38 will bring? it's only a few weeks away now. i swear if i get an AARP flyer i will shoot someone.
posted by crazy in kc @ 11:37 AM
2 Comments:
At 6/21/2005 3:12 PM,
jOoLz said…
LOL@AARP
i think you get that right before you turn 50!
look at it this way... the day you DO get mail from them for the first time, you'll probably have had some wicked recliner sex. so, it won't be so bad, now will it?
At 6/22/2005 9:16 PM,
crazy in kc said…
mmmmmmmmmmmmm recliner sex roolz !
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