mother nature blues
can i just say how much i hate mother nature?
yes i can. i can, and i will, because right now, i do.
i guess life is full of firsts. and this life with the boy is going to be full of firsts. this is what he told me in that soothing voice as i stood at the kitchen sink washing dishes and crying softly because mother nature just couldn't wait one more damn day to come. and he's right, life is full of firsts. i suppose we have to have this eventually. if we are going to be married someday and occupy the same house for the rest of our lives then this is going to have to be something that we deal with. i guess it's true, but it just doesn't seem fair right now, today, right at this moment.
perhaps it's the abundance of proper, good fucking that has brought mother nature a day early. it's entirely possible. my body isn't used to such a thing. it hasn't been used to such a thing in a very long time, but i'm thinking i could get used to it real quick.
this time here is nearly over.
and i don't know as of right now when i'll be back this way again. i know in my head what i'm hoping for but it seems so far away, so long away and when i think about it i want to cry. but it's the only way for now. work is going to start soon, the kids will go back to school, the world will start to turn again. the soonest i can see clear sky is 8 weeks ... and that's such a very long time to be without him. but it can't be helped. there is only one other option *sigh* and looking at the calendar it's not very promising because it looks like mother nature is just bound and determined to ruin my fucking life one way or another. *frowns, cries, throws a fit, stomps, kicks rocks*
that sounds really shallow. it makes it sound like it's all fantastic sex. and that couldn't be farther from the truth. so let mother nature come, i don't care. i'm content if i can be in the same room with him, just to smell him, and see him, and hold his hand, and feel the softness of his beard on the back of my shoulder...
i have 24 more hours left of that....
of feeling the soft of his beard on my shoulder
of feeling his hand on the small of my back making small circles
of feeling his rough fingers in the palm of my hand when we sit on the couch and watch tv
i have 24 more hours
and i'm getting all weepy
so it's time for me to stop now and go do something fun with my boy
peace
yes i can. i can, and i will, because right now, i do.
i guess life is full of firsts. and this life with the boy is going to be full of firsts. this is what he told me in that soothing voice as i stood at the kitchen sink washing dishes and crying softly because mother nature just couldn't wait one more damn day to come. and he's right, life is full of firsts. i suppose we have to have this eventually. if we are going to be married someday and occupy the same house for the rest of our lives then this is going to have to be something that we deal with. i guess it's true, but it just doesn't seem fair right now, today, right at this moment.
perhaps it's the abundance of proper, good fucking that has brought mother nature a day early. it's entirely possible. my body isn't used to such a thing. it hasn't been used to such a thing in a very long time, but i'm thinking i could get used to it real quick.
this time here is nearly over.
and i don't know as of right now when i'll be back this way again. i know in my head what i'm hoping for but it seems so far away, so long away and when i think about it i want to cry. but it's the only way for now. work is going to start soon, the kids will go back to school, the world will start to turn again. the soonest i can see clear sky is 8 weeks ... and that's such a very long time to be without him. but it can't be helped. there is only one other option *sigh* and looking at the calendar it's not very promising because it looks like mother nature is just bound and determined to ruin my fucking life one way or another. *frowns, cries, throws a fit, stomps, kicks rocks*
that sounds really shallow. it makes it sound like it's all fantastic sex. and that couldn't be farther from the truth. so let mother nature come, i don't care. i'm content if i can be in the same room with him, just to smell him, and see him, and hold his hand, and feel the softness of his beard on the back of my shoulder...
i have 24 more hours left of that....
of feeling the soft of his beard on my shoulder
of feeling his hand on the small of my back making small circles
of feeling his rough fingers in the palm of my hand when we sit on the couch and watch tv
i have 24 more hours
and i'm getting all weepy
so it's time for me to stop now and go do something fun with my boy
peace
posted by crazy in kc @ 2:33 AM
1 Comments:
At 7/10/2005 7:01 PM,
jOoLz said…
aww... honey... too bad about ma nature...
my bitchy aunt's in town too... you know what i do tho... i have my fun anyway. lol
it helps with the cramps!
Post a Comment
<< Home